Twerpophobia
by MeowthDat'sRight
Summary: Meowth's Afraid Of Ash! How Is Team Rocket Going To Catch Pikachu Now! Ash, Misty And Jessie Try To Find The Run-Away Cat While James And Pikachu Talk About His Love Life


**It was a freezing cold night and team rocket were asleep in their nice warm tent, well except for Meowth. J'n'J had kicked him outta their tent because he kept rolling around all over the place and scratching people in his sleep. So Meowth was outside shivering, he may have had fur but this was like a second ice age and no amount of fur could have warmed him up out there. Meowth curled his tail tighter and tighter round him until it wouldn't go any closer and he was still freezing**

**Meowth: 'GROAN' I'm neva gonna get ta sleep like dis, I betta find der tent and beg em ta let me back in**

**Meowth started to look around and eventually found a tent,**

**He ran up to it, unzipped it and crawled inside. It was wonderfully warm inside and Meowth curled up and fell asleep quickly, Of coarse, The next morning he woke up even faster**

**AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!**

**Meowth: WAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!**

**What's goin on, what happened?!**

**Misty: I WAS ABOUT TO ASK YOU THE SAME THING!!!**

**Meowth: WAA! What's a twoip doin in team rocket's tent?!**

**Misty: team rocket's tent? What're you talking about? THIS IS MY TENT!!!**

**Ash: misty, What's the matter? I heard you scream!**

**Ash unzipped the tent and just stared at misty in her pyjamas,**

**Whacking Meowth with a pillow as he covered his head with his paws**

**Ash:…Meowth! What're you doing here, and where's the rest of team rocket?**

**Ash was having pikachu charge up another thunderbolt to get rid of Meowth**

**Meowth: WAIT, WAIT**

**YA GOT IT ALL WRONG!**

**Meowth ducked down and put his paws over his head in a desperate attempt to shield himself from the oncoming attack. Pikachu's cheeks stopped sparking and she had a sympathetic look on her face**

**Ash: huh, Pikachu what's the matter? Shock Meowth and get rid of him!**

**Ash did what he always did when he didn't understand something, He scanned it with his pokedex**

**Misty: he'd scan me if I didn't speak English _;**

**Pokedex: Pokemon can sense the emotions of other pokemon and will react when they sense strong emotion.**

**Pikachu: pika, Pikapi,**

**Pikachu **

**Pikachu gave ash a worried look and ash understood what she was saying:**

**Pikachu: he's innocent! And he's real scared too! For Mewtwo's sake, I think he's gonna have a heart attack!**

**Okay I lied ash didn't really understand any of that but his pokedex was still out and when he looked at pikachu it automatically translated**

**Ash: huh, pikachu what are you talking about?**

**Misty: ash,**

**Misty pointed over to Meowth who was still covering his head with his paws and waiting for the biggest thunderbolt of his life**

**Ash:…**

**Suddenly, A miracle happened, Ash understood **

**80**

**Ash bent down and patted the cat on the head**

**Ash: don't worry Meowth, we're not gonna hurt you, Let's just walk outside and we'll all figure out what's going on, okay?**

**Meowth looked up at ash's face,**

**Meowth: …okay,**

**Ash, misty, Meowth and pikachu walked calmly out of the tent and began to talk**

**Ash: alright misty, Let's start with you, What happened this morning?**

**Misty: I don't know, I just woke up this morning and when I looked down I saw a cat curled up at the bottom of my sleeping bag**

**Ash: okay, Meowth what's your side of the story? …Meowth?**

**Ash and misty looked around to see that Meowth and pikachu were gone**

**Ash: oh great, Now he's made off with pikachu,**

**Ash and misty stood up and started to look for Meowth**

**About a few metres away,**

**Meowth: whoeva's writin dis story must like seein me get lost cause dis is like da fifth one where I do!**

**Ash: aha! Meowth stop!**

**Ash and misty surrounded him**

**Ash: alright Meowth, Where's pikachu?**

**Meowth: I thought she was wit you**

**Ash and misty both leant down and pinned Meowth to the ground by holding his paws down**

**Ash: c'mon Meowth we're not gonna believe that, now where are you hiding pikachu?!**

**Meowth: I'm telling ya I don't know what your talkin about,**

**I had enough o dat rat after da last story when I got stuck wit em, I JUST WANNA GET BACK TA JESSIE AN JAMES!!!**

**Meowth started to tear up and misty let him get up, After that he wiped his eyes and ran off to find team rocket**

**Ash: MISTY! WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!**

**Misty: ash, he was upset, he didn't know anything,**

**Ash: well then where's pikachu?!**

**Suddenly, ash and misty heard pikachu calling out to them from a distance, so they followed the sound until they ended up back at their tents again where pikachu was looking for them**

**Ash: pikachu, Where were you?**

**Pikachu was covered in lipstick, It turned out that Togepi had gotten into misty's make-up and wanted to give her a makeover**

**Misty: ya see ash, I told you Meowth didn't know anything, I think you owe him an apology**

**Ash: …yeah, I guess I do,**

**Back with Meowth,**

**He had managed to find team rocket again and was beginning to think back to last night and was trying to figure out what had happened,**

**Ash: aha! Team Rocket!**

**Jessie'n'James looked over to see ash, misty and pikachu standing in a clearing of tree's**

**(oh yeah, they're in a forest by the way)**

**Jessie: don't you twerps have anything better to do in the morning than bug us?**

**James: yeah, we just woke up, can you come back in about 20 minutes?**

**Ash: we just wanna talk to Meowth, I have something I need to tell him,**

**James: sure, knock yourselves out,**

**Ash: uh, where is Meowth?**

**James: huh?**

**Everyone looked around to discover that Meowth was gone again, So everyone started looking for him, **

**Ash and misty searched the tent site,**

**Jessie called out his name,**

**And James looked in the tent where he found a small, cat-shaped lump quivering underneath the covers**

**James pulled the covers back**

**James: Meowth, what are you doing? The twerp won't leave until he talks to you**

**James stopped as he looked at the cat, He was shaking, he had his paws on his head again and he had his eyes shut real tight. James had never seen Meowth act like this**

**Meowth: please, don't let em in here, he's gonna shock me, he's real mad!**

**James: …Meowth, what's the matter with you? You, You aren't scared of the twerp are you?**

**Meowth didn't answer, He was too ashamed to admit it**

**Ash: huh? Alright, you found Meowth!**

**Meowth: WAA!!**

**Meowth scrambled to the back of the tent and hid his face**

**Ash: huh, what's wrong?**

**He didn't answer so ash assumed that he didn't hear him and decided to get him out of the tent, So he grabbed his tail and started trying to yank him out, but by now Meowth had already sunk his claws into the tent and didn't plan on letting go**

**Misty: huh, ASH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!**

**Ash: I'm getting Meowth**

**WHACK**

**Misty whacked ash round the head with her legendary mallet and he let go, after that she shooed everyone outside and decided that they should all talk**

**Misty: alright, first things first,**

**Last night Meowth was looking for your tent but he found mine instead and must of thought it was yours, so that's where he was last night,**

**J'n'J: right,**

**Misty: so when I woke up this morning and saw him, he kinda scared me and I screamed, which scared him,**

**J'n'J: right,**

**Misty: then ash and pikachu came in and, thinking that it was another of your plans to steal pikachu, were about to blast Meowth off, so he put his paws over his head and pikachu stopped because she knew Meowth was scared and didn't know what was going on,**

**J'n'J: right,**

**Misty: then we got him outside and tried to figure out what had happened, but he started trying to find you guys, and pikachu went to find Togepi, so we thought that Meowth had made off with her,**

**James: left!**

**WHACK**

**James: ouch!**

**Misty: so we ran after Meowth and started to interrogate him to find pikachu, but he didn't know anything so I let him go and I think he must have been really scared,**

**James: but that still doesn't explain how Meowth came to be afraid of the twerp,**

**Jessie: wait, Meowth's afraid of the twerp? **

**James: yep**

**Jessie: HA! I'm never gonna let him live this one down!**

**Misty: well James, you were the one who found him, did he tell you anything?**

**James: well, he asked me not to let the twerp in because he said something about he was going to shock him**

**Misty: well then that's it,**

**Meowth's afraid of being thunderbolted**

**Jessie: but we've been blasted off a million times, why is he so scared of being thunderbolted now?**

**Misty: hmmm, Okay, I think I got it, When ash usually thunderbolts you guys, he does it when your all together, But this morning Meowth was all alone**

**Pikachu: but Meowth's been shocked on his own before, What's so different about this time?**

**Misty: well, this morning Meowth was waiting to be shocked and it never came because we all started talking, so the suspense just built and built and built, until he couldn't take it anymore, Then when he got outside and started heading back to you guys, he thought it was all over but then, We showed up and tried to interrogate him about something that he really didn't know anything about, which just sent him over the edge,**

**While all of them were talking, Meowth was in the tent, trying to sort things out for himself,**

**Meowth: look at me, scared o da twoip, maybe I outta get some help, after all how are we gonna catch dat pikachu if I can't stand bein near da twoip dat she always hangs around wit?**

**Meowth got up the courage to sneak out past everyone while they were still talking and started to run off**

_**I gotta go some place where I can get my fears sorted out, den I'll come back and we'll catch pikachu for sure**_

**Back at team rockets tent, Everyone was beginning to understand, sort of,**

**James: well what can we do to make him feel safe around twerps again?**

**Jessie: I know, What if we put him in danger?**

**Misty: …how would that help?**

**Jessie: if we put him in danger then you can come and save him, then he won't be scared of you anymore**

**Misty: but then won't he be scared of you?**

**Jessie: …oh yeah,**

**James: I've got it, If we do it at night when he's asleep, then he won't know it's us!**

**Misty: okay then, we have our plan, Well me, ash and pikachu will go back to camp and wait, you two just make Meowth feel comfortable and happy again, then we'll all meet back here again tonight, Okay?**

**James: nope, not okay,**

**Misty: why not, what's the problem?**

**James: *looking in tent* he's gone again, He must have snuck out while we were all talking**

**Misty: well then c'mon, We'll have to go find him**

**It didn't take long before they all found Meowth happily snacking on an apple he'd picked from the tree he was sitting under,**

**So all they had to do was keep an eye on him until tonight, which was easy enough because now that he had run away to think, there was nothing better to do than eat, sleep and chase Butterfrees, So when night-time came, they all went over the plan again,**

**Ash: okay so let me see if I've got this right, So I send out pikachu to pretend to attack Meowth, then I come running in and save Meowth and he won't be afraid of me anymore, right?**

**Misty: yep, that's the plan**

**Ash: okay then, pikachu go!**

**Pikachu: pika!**

**Pikachu tiptoed over to where Meowth was sleeping, and started pretending to roar, But just as she did, Meowth turned over and scratched pikachu across the face, which sent her running back to ash**

**Ash: …do we have a plan B?**

**Misty: we sure do! You two will send out your pokemon and they'll both surround Meowth, then they'll attack from both sides, ash will rush in and pretend to defeat them and he won't be scared anymore!**

**So J'n'J sent out Weezing and Arbok, who surrounded Meowth, but just as they jumped in to attack him, he rolled over again, muttered something about sonic the hedgehog and Weezing and Arbok managed to smash their heads together, which sent them running back to their trainers**

**Jessie: tell me we have a plan C**

**Misty: yep, but this was the last plan I could think of, Jessie, you send out Wobbuffet dressed up as snubbull, who'll go bite Meowth's tail, he'll freak out and ash will come running in to save the day by grabbing 'snubbull' and shooing it away, Then Meowth will thank ash and won't be scared of him anymore!**

**Jessie: okay, but this one better work,**

**Jessie called out Wobbuffet who was for some unknown reason, already in a snubbull costume, all ready to go**

**So Wobbuffet wandered over to Meowth and took a big bite of his tail, Meowth then yelled out in pain, jumped into the air and gave Wobbuffet the most powerful fury swipes ever, knocking Wobbuffet out, After which, he fell to the ground and went right back to sleep again**

**Ash:…**

**Misty:…**

**James:…**

**Jessie:…**

**Misty: great, he just foiled all three of our plans without even waking up, Well I'm afraid there's only one other way to do it,**

**The next morning,**

**Meowth woke up and stretched,**

**Meowth: 'YAWN' Dat was some night, at least it wasn't cold like da night before,**

**Ash: yeah, last night was much warmer**

**Meowth's eyes sprung open as he looked over to see ash sitting on the floor next to him**

**Meowth: WAA!!!**

**Meowth immediately put his paws over his head and waited**

**Meowth: please don't shock me, whateva I did, I didn't mean ta do it!**

**Ash: Meowth relax, I'm not gonna shock you, Pikachu's not even here**

**Meowth looked around and discovered it was true, he and ash were the only ones there and instead of being outside where he fell asleep, he was now inside a big white room, He took his paws down from on top of his head and looked around**

**Meowth: den, why are ya here? And how did I get here? And where is here for dat matta?**

**Ash: well, last night we brought you to this pokemon centre, and when we asked nurse joy what she thought we should do to help make you not scared anymore, she said to put you in this big white room with me for awhile until you weren't scared of me anymore**

**Meowth: well it ain't workin, so tell em ta let me out!**

**Ash: I can't**

**Meowth: watta ya mean ya can't, ya gotta, I don't wanna be here,**

**I wanna be outside where dere's apples an berries an places ta hide from you!**

**Ash: no, I mean I really can't, nurse joy locked the door and said she was gonna be back to let us out in about an hours time**

**Meowth was starting to panic but knew he would have to remain calm if he wanted to get out of there so he decided to go about his usual morning routine and pretend like ash wasn't even there. So, he licked his paw and started to rub the side of his face with it**

**Ash: …what're you doing?**

**Meowth: do ya mind, I'm tryin ta take a bath here,**

**Ash: here, I'll help! Squirtle, I choose you!**

**Squirtle: Squirtle!**

**Ash: Squirtle, water gun, go!**

**Squirtle: SQUIRTLE!**

**Squirtle used water gun and soaked Meowth**

**Meowth: WAA!! Make it stop, Call it back, DO SOMETHIN!**

**Ash: Squirtle, return!**

**A red light flashed and Squirtle returned to it's pokeball. When ash looked back over at Meowth, he was licking his paws desperately**

**Ash: now what're you doing?**

**Meowth: now, I gotta lick myself dry!**

**Ash: man, licking is your answer to everything!**

**Ash watched Meowth for a few seconds until he thought of something else**

**Ash: Pidgeotto, I chose you!**

**Pidgeotto: pijooo!**

**Meowth: huh?**

**Ash: Pidgeotto, use gust, help Meowth get dry!**

**Meowth: uh-oh,**

**Pidgeotto: pijoooo!**

**Pidgeotto used gust and sent Meowth flying across the room until he hit the wall**

**Ash:…oops, Pidgeotto, return!**

**There was another red flash and Pidgeotto disappeared into it's pokeball. Meowth managed to pull himself off of the wall and stumbled over to where ash was sitting, where he fell right over on his face in front of him,**

**Ash:…so Meowth, do you trust me yet? …Meowth?**

**Meowth was out cold and had left a huge, cat-shaped dent in the wall so ash was left, yet again stuck in a big white room, with a sleeping cat and nothing to do,**

**Ash: man, I'm bored 'yawn' I'm kinda tired too!**

**3 hours later,**

**Nurse joy: *opening door* sorry it took so long you guys! The lines at MacDonald's are insane at lunch time!**

**Misty: okay, let's see the new improved, not scared Meowth!**

**Jessie: huh, what the?!**

**Everyone wandered in to find ash and Meowth hugging in their sleep and grinning like idiots**

**Misty: ASH! What are you doing?!**

**Ash: zzzzzz, huh? *glances over at Meowth in his arms* oh dear Mew, tell me we didn't!**

**Jessie: MEOWTH! Get up and explain yourself!**

**James: jess, let me handle this, ahem,**

**MEOWTH! IT TURNS OUT PIKACHU'S REALLY A GIRL AND BUNEARY BROKE IT OFF WITH HER!!!**

**Meowth: zzzzzz …WHAT?!* immediately sits forward and starts looking for pikachu***

**Pikachu: I'm not sure whether to be flattered or disturbed by that!**

**Meowth: *noticing ash* WAA!**

**Meowth bolted underneath nurse joy's legs and out the door**

**Nurse joy: …well, that could've gone better!**

**Ash: 'sigh' c'mon, we better go find him!**

**Ash, misty, Jessie, James and pikachu ran out after Meowth leaving nurse joy alone to be hit on by brock, but I don't write him into my stories so, moving on…**

**Brock: awwww!**

**Joy: whew!**

**Misty: I don't see Meowth anywhere!**

**Jessie: yeah twerp, what did you do to him?!**

**Ash: I soaked him then crushed him into a brick wall!**

**Everyone:…**

**Pikachu: …well, there's just one thing that's been bothering me for a while,**

**Misty: oh yeah, what's that?**

**Pikachu: *turns to James* does Meowth really like me?*goes kinda red***

**James: trust me, he is one smitten kitten!**

**Meowth watched them walk past calling his name as he hid up in a tree**

**Meowth: …whew! Dat was close, now's my chance ta climb down and run off de udder way! … uh-oh!**

**Meowth began to see a flaw in his plan when he realised that he had no idea how to get down and was stuck in the tree**

**About 10 hours later,**

**Meowth had made a makeshift hammock by tying a very long leaf to where the branches connected to the tree trunk and now he was looking up at the stars,**

**Meowth: … 'sigh', maybe I shoulda just stayed out in da cold, it woulda saved a really long, pointless 'fic!**

**Meanwhile,**

**Everyone was calling Meowth's name and still searching for him, except James and pikachu who were busy with other things,**

**Pikachu: so he really likes me?**

**James: yep!**

**Pikachu: well, what about me does he like?**

**James: hmm, well I know he's always talking about your big, brown eyes!**

**Pikachu: 'giggle' *goes pink***

**James: and your tail, he's always loved that tail of yours!**

**Pikachu: *goes light red***

**James: and the brown stripes on your back, he always says how he always wanted stripes but they look better on you!**

**Pikachu: *whole face goes same colour as cheeks* but, how do you know all this stuff?**

**James: I read it in his 'book that's not a diary' *pulls out book stamped 'NOT A DIARY'***

**Pikachu: lemme see!**

**James: sorry pikachu, rocket agents only!**

**Pikachu: well at least tell me something it says in there!**

**James: alright, alright! *flicks through pages* 'ahem' dear book that's not a diary, I was so sure today would be the day, the day I would finally tell pikachu what she meant to me, but those twerps were all around her and I couldn't get close enough, looks like it'll have to be tomorrow, oh well…**

**Pikachu: …wow, read me another one! Read me another one!**

**James: alright, alright already, sheesh! *flicks pages again* dear book that's still not a diary, today was supposed to be the day that I told pikachu everything, but I chickened out, it's just, I was gonna tell her but, what if she says she doesn't like me? I can't do it, I tried earlier, I walked up to her, I was about to say it when she asked me why my face was going all red so I just ran away instead, I'll never get her at this rate…**

**Pikachu: …when was that from?**

**James: um, it says here episode 8!**

**Pikachu: so, Meowth's always liked me?**

**Jessie: sure he has, for the whole first series he wouldn't shut up about ya!**

**Pikachu: why doesn't he just come and tell me? Is he scared of me or something?**

**James: nah, he's just too shy that's all! Ever heard that song 'kiss the girl' from the little mermaid?**

**Pikachu: yeah,**

**James: well that's more or less exactly what's happening here!**

**The next morning,**

**Ash: *sitting under tree* 'sigh', we'll never find Meowth, I give up!**

**Misty: you can't give up ash, we have to find him, the show won't be the same without a talking cat with a funny accent, a bad past and the ability to mock Jessie and James in every episode!**

**Ash: but we've looked everywhere and it's not as if he's just gonna fall out of the sky! (you can see where I'm going with this)**

***Meowth falls out of tree screaming and lands in ash's lap***

**Ash: …*turns to misty* I gotta be honest, I didn't think that would work!**

**Meowth: WAA!**

**Meowth tried to bolt but jess and James grabbed him and held him up by his arms**

**Meowth: *struggling* lemme go you guys! Put me down! I gotta get outta here!**

**Jessie: this is for your own good!**

**James: we're only doing this because we love you Meowth!**

**Misty: …uh, what are we doing because we love him again?**

**Ash: well, I found this pokemon whistle! It says on it that if you blow in to it then all wild pokemon in the surrounding area will fall in love with you! I think it's supposed to make them easier to catch or something!**

**Ash blew into the whistle and Meowth's ears shot up, he stopped squirming and Jessie and James put him back down. He sat for a minute looking spaced out before marching over to ash**

**Meowth: what is your wish masta?**

**Ash: what the?!**

**James: what's the matter with him?**

**Pikachu waved her paw in front of Meowth's eyes and he didn't even blink**

**Pikachu: he's totally gone!**

**Misty: *reading the small print on the side of the whistle* it says here that the Side effects may include pokemon acting hypnotised, having mood swings or losing self-control!**

**Pikachu: this can not end well!**

**Meowth growled, leapt onto ash's head and started scratching him like crazy**

**Ash: WAAA!!! Somebody help! Get him off!**

**Meowth jumped down from ash's head, ran over to James and started bawling his big blue eyes out**

**James: M-Meowth, what's the matter?**

**He ran over to pikachu and kissed her on the lips before running back over to ash, sitting down and staring blankly at the sky again**

**Pikachu: *bright red and shocked* ………**

**Ash: *covered in scratch marks* ouch! I guess this was a bad idea!**

**Jessie: ya think?**

**James: what the heck just happened?**

**Misty: I think that was the mood swings part of the side effects, only in fast motion!**

**Everyone looked at Meowth, wondering why he had just done a 13-18 year old impression in 5 seconds and he started to chase his tail then ran over and purred up against misty's leg**

**Jessie: and what do you call that?**

**Misty: um, I think this is the losing self control part of the side effects? … I hope…**

**Pikachu: wow, this is the most he's acted like a real pokemon since that flash-back episode! When does this stuff wear off?**

**Ash: *reading whistle* I dunno, it doesn't say,**

**Meowth suddenly stopped purring, opened his eyes and shook his head**

**Meowth: w-what da? What's goin on here?**

**Jessie: I'm gonna go with 5 minutes tops!**

**Meowth: WAA! Twoip!**

**Meowth turned and bolted again but jess and James grabbed him and held him up again**

**Meowth: you guys, lemme go! Dis ain't right! It's cruelty ta pokemon!**

**Misty: he's not serious is he? If this IS cruelty to pokemon then we could go to jail!**

**Jessie: relax, he said that last time we tied him up too!**

**Pikachu: uh, guys…**

**Meowth: you guys, lemme down! Dis is painful!**

**James: look Meowth, this hurts us more than it hurts you!**

**Pikachu: you guys…**

**Jessie: stop being a baby Meowth, just patch it up with the twerp so we can end this fanfic already!**

**Meowth: LEMME GO! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!**

**Misty: are you guys sure about this? It sure seems like Meowth's in a lot of pain!**

**Jessie: he's just being dramatic! Give him a minute to make up with the twerp and he'll calm down!**

**Meowth stopped squirming and got those big spiral things in his eyes that pokemon get in the show when they faint**

**James: what the?**

**Ash: he's fainted!**

**Misty: but how?**

**Pikachu: YOU GUYS!!!**

**Everyone: *turns to face pikachu***

**Pikachu: …thank you! I've been trying to tell you guys, look!**

**Pikachu pointed to underneath Meowth and Jessie and James held him up high to reveal snubbull jumping up, biting Meowth's tail, falling off and jumping up again**

**Ash: it's snubbull!**

**James: so Meowth really was in pain! He wasn't being dramatic!**

**Jessie: calm down! So he's knocked out now, all we have to do is shoe off snubbull and wait till he comes to**

**Misty: how is that gonna help? He'll still be scared of ash and the fanfic will go on even longer!**

**Jessie: no, when he wakes up, he'll probably think that it was just a dream, we'll play along and everything will go back to normal, thus ending the story!**

**Pikachu: *pushing snubbull out of the story* are you sure it'll work?**

**Jessie: well sure, that cat's so gullible, he'd believe you if you told him that we're really a tv show! Hahahaha!**

**Everyone: yeah, hahahahahaha!!!**

…

***1 plan set up later***

**Meowth: *blink* huh?**

**Meowth sat up and looked around at James**

**James: morning Meowth, sleep well?**

**Meowth: yup! I even had dis weird dream, I was afraid o da twoip!**

**James: that is weird! But at least everything's back to normal now right?**

**Jessie: *walks in* hi guys!**

**Meowth: WAA! It's Jessie! *runs off in fear***

**Everyone else: 'sigh'**


End file.
